To All Men: You're Not A Hero For Doing The Right Thing

April 27, 2021

Not all men

There's a new trend on social media and it's men sharing threads on their socials of how they helped a woman not get hurt by another man. Most of the people who actively like these kind of stories are women, understandably so, with 97% of us having been harassed in one way or another, this isn't surprising. Finally, we've found a good man in-between all the bad apples. Am I the only one who finds this yet  another way where women are being exploited? Where Feminism is being misused. Where men take advantage of women and girls' experiences. You post their stories on social media and suddenly you are the good guy. A story where a woman was fearing for her life. Did you ask if it was okay for you to share this online? Did you ask for consent? Exactly, I don't think you did. 

To all men who are helping a woman in times of need, you're not a hero, you're simply a decent human being. Stop wasting your time making threads on social media on how women being harassed makes you feel and start advocating for us. Respect us. Start educating your fellow men. You don't need to be praised by women or 'spread awareness' by sharing our stories. Women already know this happens. We live this life on a daily basis. We fear men on a daily basis. Stop using us and start standing with us. You're okay saving girls from a stranger but you have no issues ignoring your creepy friends making us uncomfortable. You still engage in sexist conversations and you don't speak up when women's rights are on the line. When your favorite rich person is accused of sexual misconduct you are the first one to victim shame. Stop using feminism when it only benefits you. 

Change the way you speak to and about women and girls. Help us to gain access to positions of power. Help and support ALL women. Women of different races, religions, body types and sexualities, support trans women, disabled women, sex workers and women living in poverty. You're not a good guy if you pick and choose who to lift up and who you let down. There will be no freedom for us if you're not here for all of us. You benefit from a society based on misogyny and you are blind. Are you helping out with chores in the household or do you believe in gender roles? Do you advocate for women in your workplace or do you silently enjoy your man salary? Are you educating your sons and daughters equally, or do you shelter your daughters from other men and do not teach your sons the importance of consent? Do you value sexual education for men and women? Sexual freedom? Do you care about bodily autonomy for women, trans and non binary people? Are you excited when women are granted free period products and paid period leave or are you filled with uncontrollable rage at the near thought of women's struggles being important? Do you think vaginal discharge and menstruation are dirty? Are you okay with women's care products being priced higher when we are paid less? What about women who have a lot of body hair? Do you judge them or do you let them live their lives? Do you refer to girls as being 'mature for their age'? Do you enjoy staring at women and girls or do you acknowledge it's creepy behavior? 

Look around you, stop sharing our stories for clout online and start educating yourself and others, you're not a hero for doing the right thing. Women don't have the privilege of safely sharing their stories online. They are threatened and silenced. Instead of making your own social media post, why don't you start supporting the content made by women and girls on these topics? Let us be heard loud and clear. Give women a platform. Make us feel safe on social media. Be a good ally. 

Support all women

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