Jolien Nathalie

I talk beauty & mental health


Even though I've made progress mental health wise, I haven't really mentioned the fact that I've actually been struggling loads since we've been back from our Summer holidays. Overall, I do have a more positive mindset and outlook on life, but my attitude in the last month or so has been very up and down. I'm cranky and angry, I've been crying a lot and I have been having those headaches where the pain stretches all the way down to the back my neck. It's almost as if I've been PMS-ing this whole time and it's causing me a lot of anxiety. At first I told myself - oh these post holiday blues are so real - but it seems like they are never ending and I'm just a little confused as to how I haven't managed to pick myself up again.
Essence Insta Perfect Foundation

Essence Cosmetics recently released a new foundation in their makeup line: the Essence Insta Perfect Liquid Makeup Foundation. It is available in 9 different shades and is super affordable as it only retails for just under 5 bucks. Essence promises that their new #instaperfect makeup has a strong matte effect, with buildable coverage that is long lasting and waterproof, yet lightweight. They also encourage you to mix and match their new foundation, if necessary, to attain your perfect shade. I'm very happy Essence finally decided to be more inclusive with their range this time, they're not quite there yet but it's a start. They previously would only have a maximum of 4 different colors. I do have to ask, when will they finally decide to simply call their foundations a 'foundation'? What does liquid makeup even mean?

Something that has been very close to my heart, ever since I started going to therapy, is self care. Growing up I didn't know what self care was, I wasn't allowed to practise self care and when I did I was expected to feel guilty about it. Everything in my life always needed to have a greater purpose, needed to be about others, about helping people and being compassionate. As a result I've never really been compassionate or understanding towards myself. I never felt good enough as a human being and I thought I didn't deserve anything. In fact, when I would be kind to myself the guilt would be so extreme that I would either become sad or angry, or both. Through therapy I'm finally learning that self care is okay and that it is in fact a necessity. Today, I want to touch upon the way self care is often portrayed as an excuse to go shopping or simply spend loads of money. That is not what self care is, to me at least. There is a very important aspect of self care, especially amongst bloggers, that is not or rarely talked about, especially when it comes to those who struggle with their mental health.
Pixi Highlighter Duo Review

Today marks a special day on my blog, I'm going to be reviewing my first ever Pixi makeup products! I received a gorgeous PR parcel in the mail by the Pixi team and now that I've had time to play around with the samples, I cannot wait to share with you my experience trying products from this amazing brand. The Pixi Glowy Gossamer Duo Highlighters definitely were the items in the parcel that caught my eyes immediately, I'll be reviewing the duos called Subtle Sunrise and Delicate Dew, here are my thoughts!

I got major baby fever at 23, I really wanted a child, I really wanted to be pregnant. Now at 28, not so much anymore. I got scared. I got a little reality check. I learned a lot whilst being in therapy, about family dynamics, about being neglected as a child, about being humiliated and emotionally abused. Today, I am afraid of being a bad mom, about making the same mistakes my parents did. I'm afraid of potentially having to deal with severe postpartum depression and for all the changes my body would go through. At 23 I didn't even give that a second thought, how physically and emotionally demanding it is for a woman, to carry and have a child. On my blog I write about mental health, beauty and more recently a lot of lifestyle topics - such as quitting birth control and body confidence. I like my body now, a lot, and the fact that I didn't enjoy or appreciate it when I was younger makes me sad but also makes me admire and respect my body so much more today. I do have to admit that, somehow, thinking of having children has turned into something that just isn't worth it to me. Not anymore. I struggle with depression and anxiety, which has caused me to be in a lot of physical pain, and now that I've overcome so much - I just can't imagine having a family.
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