Honest About Beauty

Monday, 20 February 2017

5 X Why You're Not A Successful Blogger


Growing an empire online is beyond challenging, especially when you don't have a background in business and marketing, or simply don't have the right connections. There are however a couple of things that definitely play at your advantage when you're planning on making yourself a great online success, fast, whether you are blogging or youtubing. I don't often make fun of online trends but I've been confronted with so many that it's just too good to leave it, and obviously this is everything I am not and don't do haha. Here we go! You're not a successful blogger because ...


- You don't have a pet

 Having your pet featured on your social media accounts immediately gets all the pet lovers on board. No matter what your target audience is, people with pets will love your content! Pet lovers have an instant connection with each other, by putting your pet online you create a whole new realm and reason for people to follow you. 

- You don't have the latest new iPhone 

iPhones are the new portable computer, you can literally do a-n-y-t-h-i-n-g on the go. Having the newest iPhone means you can film in HD, take the best pictures for your online content #letmetakeaselfie, be connected with your audience at all time and include it as an accessory in all your blog posts! Your blog post photos will have that instant feel of glam and success! Don't forget that marble phone case though, or your iPhone's useless. 

- You don't own a rose gold watch 

If you don't have the newest watch around your wrist at all times, you are missing out on those likes and shares, hun. Right now, it is the hottest accessory out there. Doesn't matter if you can read the clock or not, jeez, have you been living under a rock? Having a watch included in every fashion, and non-fashion post for that matter, is an absolute must. Rose gold or Daniel Wellington, please! 

- You're not a vegan 

If you want to be an online success, you have to be vegan. Get those veggies and fruits in and the vegan lifestyle community will skyrocket your traffic like it's nobody's business. It's all about being green and clean and lean. Enough of that emotional eating, go raw and all your problems will be solved!

- You don't have a flawless, white Instagram feed 

Get that #instalife going though! Every single photo you post needs to be washed out to the max, white and perfect and certainly not forced. Get some white sheets, a lot of white sheets, and get yo breakfast, MacBook, stilettos and sexy lace socks on there! Adidas shoes have also been very in, so if you don't have a pair, I'd be ordering some white now, ehm, right now. Your life will look so flawless everyone will want to be you, and of course, follow you.

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124 comments

  1. Damn out of all that I only own a pet, I'll never be a top blogger... Aha great post x

    http://www.paigespreferences.com

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    1. Haha thanks, I'm glad you liked it :P time to get yo pet on the internetz!

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  2. I have lot of pets can I be a great blogger

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    1. Of course you can :) Thanks for checking out my post!

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  3. Any ways it it a good piece of writing

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  4. Any ways it it a good piece of writing

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  5. Hahaha, all of these are so true! I see my likes skyrocket when I have my cat or ripped jeans or 'healthy food' in pictures on Instagram.

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    1. Oh yes, healthy food pics are also the real shit right now haha, I wonder what will be next :D xxx

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  6. Hilarious read. I'll add skate board for men's fashion bloggers in this list.

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    1. Really? I need to be following more men on Instagram, I totally missed that :D Thanks!

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  7. hahahahaha I love this! Well done!

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  8. Loved your post.. I need to start exploiting my pet pics and my vegan lifestyle.. Lolz..

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    1. Hahaha thanks girl, you totally should! Good luck ;)

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  9. This is gold!! I couldn't stop laughing.Good one!!

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    1. Thank you :D I'm so glad you liked it!

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  10. This is gold!! I couldn't stop laughing.Good one!!

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  11. I have two pugs & a rose gold watch, 2/5ths of the way to being a successful blogger haha! Loved this (:

    L x

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    1. Yeeeeeeees, that's the spirit haha! Thank you :D

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  12. Love it! It's funny but also very true. There are such big pressures and expectations about what will work all the time, I think we all get a bit worked up over it!

    www.sheepishlyshameful.com

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    1. Yes I agree, I'm so happy everyone is having a good laugh here :)

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  13. Haha really loved this post! I have a beagle and an iPhone 6 so I guess I'm on my way to success, fame and fortune!

    DippyWrites

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    1. Oh yes you are! Good luck and keep up the good work :D

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  14. I love this!! Haha it made me laugh :)

    www.maggiealamode.com

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  15. Bahahaha! Awesome. I should have read this post before trying to actually make it as a blogger. Luckily my dog is super cute but the rest... sigh.....
    xo
    styleontheside.com

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    1. Hahaha I shouldn't have started blogging at all :P

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  16. Then I'm sure not a great blogger... Haven't got most of these ;)

    https://livinglifefullyalive.wordpress.com/

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  17. So, okej. Pet, rose gold watch, new iPhone and sheets. Got It. Thank god I already have white Adidas :-)
    Love your post

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    1. You are slaying that checklist girl! Thanks hun ;) glad you liked it Xxxx

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  18. hahahaha your post was awesome! Girl, you totally deserve to be a sucessful blogger, because you're great ^^
    www.malusilva.com.br

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  19. hahaha! This was so funny, but true!

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  20. Just found your blog!! I'm in love great photos!!

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  21. This made me laugh so much! #dayMade <3

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    1. Aaaw so cool! You're welcome honey <3 :D

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  22. Hahaha love the blog!!! Love to connect with other bloggers!!!!! <3

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  23. Very interesting! I like this post! So true!

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  24. I loved this! Made me laugh! Fads everywhere. lol

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  25. You absolutely must have a lot of kids and be a home schooling mom, who's completely debt free! It's the only way you'll be able to get followers.

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  26. lol okay so i fit only the first few and then it gets... lol! :)))
    www.MARINASAYS.com

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  27. Lol so true I love this post. All I have is the oet, no wonder I'm struggling
    Lauren
    livinginaboxx | bloglovin

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  28. Maybe I should change my blog to white and trendy one called "iPhones, watches and pet pandas" maybe that would at least double amount of readers haha. :D Honestly, I think it's better to be real and interesting in your niche. Of course, if you write about trends it's good to be in.

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    1. Omg can you imagine lol XD you're so funny and you're right, I completely agree!

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  29. Hilarious! I need to get a puppy and iphone I knew that was it! Great post

    Xoxo
    Christina
    Www.styletothet.com

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  30. Hilarious! I need to get a puppy and iphone I knew that was it! Great post

    Xoxo
    Christina
    Www.styletothet.com

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  31. Love this! It's hilarious, but is so true! For me it is "none of the above " LOL
    Plus I'm allergic to animal fur, but I make sure to never mention that on social media

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    1. Oh no that needs to be kept a secret for sure :P

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  32. lol very on point! don't forget the travel posts, fancy coffee art and bunch of product shots :D

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    1. How on earth did I forget those coffee posts!? Thank honey! :D

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  33. Loved this one!!! You forgot the coffee. You have to drink and post coffee.
    www.helloyinabrown.com

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    1. Oh yes! Lots of coffee! :D Thanks for checking out my blog! Xxx

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  34. That was great. Couldn't stop laughing. Enjoyed reading it.

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    1. Aaaaaw that makes me so happy :D Xxxx Have a nice day!

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  35. Ahahaha. That post just made my day. So bloody true.You could have have added michael kors gold watch.

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  36. Great post although I don't agree with the 'you aren't vegan' part. As an ethical vegan, I love it when people promote a vegan lifestyle. :) But other than that it's a funny article! :)

    www.fashionatic.be

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    1. True :) I personally find that people who become vegan because of a trend are not always ethical vegans though, wich is a bit sad. Thank you for your feedback!Xxxx

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  37. Loved this post and the humour involved ha,ha! I've actually just started theming my IG and do notice a difference and it looks more organised now so I feel this does help! xx

    Jenny | Krystel Couture

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    1. That is so cool, I'm off to your instagram now :D

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  38. So true! One more: eating sushi all the time.

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    1. The sushi, so true! I love sushi though, it's so good :D

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  39. That was a great post! I guess I am a terrible blogger then, as I have none of these! lol
    Can we add what seems to be the obligatory starbucks cup?....I hate starbucks also! lol
    www.thecommonprincess.com

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    1. Yes! No one ever gets tired of those haha they've been trending for ages :D

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  40. Funny cause it's true :) people love my cat, but I don't own a rose gold or DW-watch and this makes me so said (haha no).
    Nice to read a "how to" with a twist :)

    Xx Naomi http://Tempspournousblog.wordpress.com

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    1. I'm glad you liked it, going to check out your cat now :D XXx

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  41. I laughed my ass off with this one! :P

    Not a vegan, no white sheets, no iPhone.. I'm never gonna make it! :D

    YouTube | Blog: Geekette in High Heels | Instagram

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  42. Hahaha 2/5. Too bad ;-)
    X Charissa | W W W . L A D Y G O L D A P P L E . C O M

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  43. Hahaha love this and I totally agree!!! I have been so tempted to change my Insta aesthetic to the white background as everyone who has it has zillions of followers! Have to try hard not to fall for trends and be a classic instead ;) xx

    www.theemasphere.com

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  44. Don't forget taking photos from above of coffee in hipster-looking coffee shops! That's the way to be insta-famous, apparently...

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  45. I clicked on this link out of curiosity as I was thinking I wouldn't like the post because I'm not into the negative vibes, people telling you you can't do things, ... so basically I thought I was going to dislike this post very much .. but then I read it and I just couldn't stop laughing! Haha. OMG literally every one of these is true, and I am / have none of those. Oops. Guess I won't be a successful blogger haha ;) Thanks for the laugh!!

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    1. I admire your honesty, thank you and you are welcome :)

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  46. that's why I like your blog so much! you are like sooo different, i love it! xx
    p.s I laughed way too much at this post hahaha

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    1. Aw thanks, you're so sweet :D Have an amazing day honey! Xxxxx

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  47. could I ask you know do you link your instagram to your blog, I have tried and for some reason I cant do it. Can you help me. Thanks.

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    1. It's a widget I installed from the website snapwidget.com :)

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  48. Haha:D So true! So many fashion bloggers today are exactly the same ( I'm probably guilty of being a bit samey sometimes myself). I'm so tired of samey, I want something new. Great post, love your pictures:)

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  49. Haha that post is amazing! The truth has been spoken! :)

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  50. I love this post! It's so original and funny. Seriously, all those trends that I have been hating but feel like I must adopt to be successful. Vegan one and the white insta feed is the worst.

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    1. Haha they are ridiculous indeed, thanks!

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  51. I L O V E your sarcasm. New follower for sure :) I'm heading over your last post to read all of them :))

    Mikela from www.lovingfromberlin.blogspot.com

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  52. Loved this one! You're so right :-D....the pets, marble, vegan food... Lucky me with my adorable cat :-D. Still saving myself an IPhone tough :p

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    1. Same here haha! I just saw your instagram feed, you have such beautiful pictures!! :D <3

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  53. Both your articles about why you're not a succeseful blogger and this one start with the same paragraph. This is not a wise SEO move, maybe you should add to
    your list "you don't create original content or SEO appropriate".
    I am not trying to be rude, it's just a piece of advice because I work in marketing and I know that this might affect your blog.

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    1. I don't think 'original content' and 'SEO' are the same thing, original content is different to everyone, SEO is the same. It's true that it's not a smart move SEO wise but my article looks better that way and I can adjust it whenever I want. It's funny that you mention it because I actually just added that today, this post originally didn't have an intro. You may consider yourself not rude, but the way you 'presented' to me 'my mistake' however is very poor, you could work on that :)

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  54. this is awesome. I love you and this post!
    There you have it, an online love declaration.. not as cute as a pet.. sorry about that
    but you got yourself a new follower right here

    Karlien

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    1. Hahahahahaha thanks honey, I love it <3 :D

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  55. Hilarious!!! I wish I had a pet though....
    Clem x
    ravacholle.blogspot.com

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  56. God I'm so sick of these -_- Good point!
    xx
    www.glamretrostyle.com

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  57. At last I realise where I was going wrong! I knew my meat eating lifestyle was letting me down 🙈 Thank you for this fabulous post!

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    1. Hahaha your comment made me laugh so much! Thank you and you're welcome of course! Xxx :D

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  58. Where's my cat? Where's my dog? I need to buy a crocodile and a squirrel. Oh, and I must strip my beds and use those white sheets for photos. What else can I do? I must say goodbye to beef, pork and chicken. It is a big sacrifice, but if it can help me become a bettter blogger then why not. ;) Thanks for making my miserable day become a funny once :)

    http://katswhiskers47.com/

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    1. I think being the best person you can be is what makes a great blogger! I'm so happy to hear my post made you laugh, keep your head up <3 Have an amazing day! Xxx :)

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  59. Awesome! :D Have to say, I have about half of the things mentioned, so I guess I am a semi successful blogger. :D But really loved your sense of humor. :D
    Madara
    Lookforsmile.com

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    1. Aw I'm so glad :D Thank you! Good luck blogging ;) <3 Xxxx

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  60. Brilliant post! It certainly did make me chuckle :'D loving your blog! Ellis x
    www.elliswoolley.blogspot.com

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  61. Hahaha I laughed so much! This is a great blog post and I do have the same opinion.

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    1. Yay! Thank you :D I'm glad you like it. Xxx

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