I didn't plan on taking a 2 week blogging break but when my vacation started the 24th of August, I couldn't see myself blogging throughout my entire trip. I was home alone the week before I left and I hadn't prepared or scheduled any articles. I was overwhelmed with the amount of new makeup I purchased and I didn't know where to start with reviews or even how to take proper flatlays of all the products as the weather wasn't doing me any favours (it was either way too sunny or way too dark). I took a break from the internet, from social media and I have to say that I didn't even miss it that much which surprised me because the internet is like my second home, my creativity outlet, my self care sanctuary. Now that I'm sitting down at my desk again, after a 2 week holiday, to write this post I can feel my fingers tingling again, I'm excited to be back!
August is over and I want to share my self care diary first. I started it last month and even though August was quite a disastrous self care month, to say the least, I want to vent a little bit and then end up on a positive self care note, which is the purpose of this monthly diary: focus on the little things I've accomplished that will help me overcome anxiety and improve my overall mental wellbeing. Why was it so bad you ask? Well ... I feel like I made many poor decisions, that I tried to please the people around me rather than myself, and as a result put my mental health in jeopardy. Sounds dramatic I know, but I panicked and kept on making one 'mistake' after another. I felt like I didn't have a grip on my life, that others were making decisions for me and that I had no voice. I accepted invitations I knew weren't good for me and I didn't plan out my days properly. The part I'm the most frustrated about is that people somehow think you have absolutely nothing to do when you're a stay at home girlfriend, with mental health issues. That you're not your own person because you're in a relationship with someone who's successful and that any issues you have somehow aren't valid because of that. It all comes down to ignorance but somehow it still bothers me loads. I'm treated like being in a relationship is a privilege, and privileged people are not entitled to have emotions and/or feelings. Even though I went on vacation and was lucky enough to travel to 3 different destinations, I did have a meltdown in every place I visited. My anxiety took a toll on me and my self care was far to be seen. I went to Aix-en-Provence, Cassis (both South of France) and Milan (Italy). I had a lot of fun but going on vacation isn't an easy thing for me to do. The unpredictability of every day activities was exciting but it also stressed me out loads.
As I said before, my self care this month was poor but I can't deny that I at least tried, here is a list of my self care accomplishments in August!
- I went to see 2 new movies at the cinema in 1 afternoon
Before anxiety became a barrier in my life I would go to the cinema once or twice a month. This happened to be a Saturday where I felt good enough to spend and entire afternoon there, I watched the new Independence Day movie and The Legend of Tarzan. I loved the last one, Independence Day was lame, especially compared to the first one haha.
- I ordered €50 worth of makeup
This wasn't an expense I had planned, but the Essence and Catrice Cosmetics new makeup collections launched early and I just had to get my hands on every single item available. I was beyond excited when I found out kruidvat.be already had stocked up on everything, it was such a nice surprise.
- I discovered new places
I went to have drinks for the first time in a bar where I was always hesitant to go for absolutely no reason. I ended up having a really great time and discovered they also have a library inside and a club to go dancing! Another place I went to, after being shy for a long time, was one of the largest markets in Europe, I purchased some new indoor plants for my house and a couple avocados, for good measure.
-I went to the gynaecologist
I'v had problems with yeast infections since I was very young, and even though I pretty much have everything covered now, a visit to the gynaecologist was long overdue. Not to mention that Pap smear that is now required every year, since I turned 25, ugh. I was nervous about finding a great doctor, especially after having had such bad experiences with a GP, who didn't care about my health at all. I booked an appointment in a hospital and went with my boyfriend, everything went really well which was such a relief.
- I organised a self care package
When I'm home alone eating is one of my biggest struggles. I don't have issues with food, but feeding myself when I'm alone is just not all that. I'm either too lazy to prepare/order anything or I literally just forget to eat. This time I planned out my meals, made extra portions the weeks before, placed them in the freezer, and purchased a couple premade food items for tough times.
Q: What did your self care look like this past month? Share it in the comments below!
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